Duneekable Notions

Unruffled Thoughts of a Wanderer

Bad Decisions Won’t Go Anywhere, But Regret Is A Choice.

Life can become so much simpler when you know this. 

We all had those moments where we are faced with an impossible choice. Which university to choose, with life partner to settle with, and sometimes even which meal to choose from McDonald’s. We always struggle to make up our mind on deciding what is best for us. Sometimes we let someone else make them for us, or we let weird superstitions or a trial of luck choose it for us. If I had a penny for all the times where I let a coin decide for me, I would be a millionaire by now.

We put ourselves under immense stress when making these decisions. Mainly because we hate the regret we might get by making the wrong choice. Still, every one of us is full of regret. But some of us don’t let it ruin us. When you let regret into your head, it keeps consuming you. You lose energy and become irritable.

If you have given enough thought to this like me. By now, you would have given up on trying to make every choice perfect. Instead, discuss how we can avoid regret through mindset change, over trying to make all the choices right.

Accept that you are not perfect.

We sometimes tend to believe that we have become much better at making choices over time. We assume we are capable of making better choices because we know better. Yes, with experiences in life, you get a clearer sense of right and wrong. With that, you get to make some decisions more accurately. But none of it is hardly perfect.

Firstly, there are so many environmental factors which you have no control whatsoever. For example, up until last year, an investment in the tourism sector was a very clever choice to make. It created passive income sources for many, and the idea was that the industry will never collapse. Because people will not stop traveling. Then came COVID-19 to wipe everything out.

Now, there was no way on earth that you would have known this coming. The decisions you make are always relative to the time you make them. There could be a plethora of things that could go wrong, which you cannot control. Accepting this tiny detail can let you avoid regret a lot. Furthermore, it will help you bounce back from a bad situation faster.

It’s your life, don’t let someone else make choices.

two railway lines separating
Photo by Ivan Aleksic on Unsplash

Most of us are guilty of this senseless practice. Whenever we are faced with a “Sophie’s choice”, we suddenly decide that everything around us knows better about ourselves than us. We let our parents, partners, friends, and even strangers make decisions for us. But there is absolutely no way of them knowing more about yourself than you.

But don’t get me wrong. Advice from reliable people always helps. They would have valuable tips that you can consider when making the decision. But never let anyone make the choice for you.

There are two reasons why someone usually let others make choices. First, you feel it is impossible to make a choice by yourself. You open up and ask for help but end up letting others make the choices for you. Or you fear taking the responsibility of your own choices and consequences. You assume it is best to let someone else make that choice. Either way, it is you who has to live with the consequences in the end. As Tony Robbin’s ones shared.

Your life changes the moment you make a new, congruent, and committed decision.”  

Tony Robbins

You need to make sure that the decision is 100% yours, and yours only. That way, you know that the consequences of your choice will also be yours. Troubles always seem manageable when they are your troubles. You will have less time regretting because you need to get out of the mess you made.

Sometimes the situation you put yourself into is not as bad as you think. Yet, if the choice is made by someone else for you, it is always easy to see the dark side of it. The chances of you looking out for that silver lining increases when you own up to your decisions.

One bad choice cannot ruin it all.

few stones on top of each other
Photo by Andrik Langfield on Unsplash

Believe it I or not, each and every person in this world has made bad choices. It is no brainer. But some managed to bounce back from them than others. A single bad choice can never define you. No matter how bad your decision is, there will always be a way up. You might end up in a different position in your life with the choice you made. Yet, there are always two trajectories from there onwards. Either you can accept the mess and decide to move up and enjoy the ride. Or, you can let it ruin you.

If you watch the movie catch me if you can, starring Leonardo Dicaprio. Frank Senior repeats a story over and over again. Two mice fell into a bucket of milk. One quickly gave up and drowned. But the second mouse, he struggled so hard that he eventually churned that cream into butter and he walked out.

Likewise, it is no use to dwell on the past. The only person that can decide your fate is you, and you only.

Whether you like it or not, we constantly make choices in life. Some are less significant compared to others. But it all mounts up together at the end, to define who you are today. But what it cannot do, is to define who you will be in the future.

You can never become someone who only makes the perfect choices. But you can be someone who has no regrets in life.

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